There are ways to prevent educators (fathers, mothers, or others) from focusing on the problem and finding solutions, and to bring the child-owner’s approach to the situation…In these patterns, we mentioned 15 ways to deal with your problem. In order for children to receive better education and mental health, they should avoid the annoying behaviors of using them to enhance resistance to children’s psychology and character:
Shouting eliminated the language of communication and understanding between the two sides of the equation… The son entered a state of self-defense and fear loudly, focusing on ways to protect him from unexpected reactions, which he was not interested in. His behavior caused crying and caused crying. In addition, screams also occurred, the so-called child (negative bond), which will continue throughout the child’s life. No matter how old he is, anything placed in front of him can restore the negative emotions he experienced as a weak child.
2- Condemnation And Blame
Too much condemnation and blame resonate in the heart, cut off the relationship, separate the hearts of the people and eliminate the positive feelings between the two sides;
3- More Commands: Perform This Operation And Not Perform This Operation
There were too many orders that followed, which made the son a machine to execute orders, weakened his character and weakened him, making him a submissive man without a substance;
All kinds of threats: (direct and indirect, gentle and violent…) neither help nor help solve the problem, nor do they keep the younger son away from boring behavior. If it seems to us that he left this behavior and gave up, then it is temporary, out of fear of threats, not out of internal beliefs and motivations.
Irony is an unacceptable behavior that deprives him of friendly confidence and persuades him to be unable to give up boring behavior. In addition, irony can destroy morale and weaken the child’s body, and usually enters an introverted world to interact with him in a positive and independent manner. Environmental interaction
Curse the child and describe him with negative adjectives to prove these descriptions and persuade the child to get along with them. In addition to insulting his son, it will cause evil and bad manners, but also make him a victim of tongue damage;
Never compare one child with another, because comparisons between two people are initially not allowed. This is illogical, because comparisons are usually made between two behaviors or two situations, not between two persons. Compare between individuals. Comparing one child with another is a way to destroy the child’s self-confidence and ability, and make them believe that they have failed and cannot be the same as other children.
8- Exaggeration In Preaching:
Human souls refuse to exaggerate preaching and get bored. The child refuses to accept constant exaggeration and direct preaching. If he appears in front of others among his cousins or friends, the negative influence of increasing preaching will increase…
9- Misunderstandings About Children:
The always negative interpretation of behavior is considered a misunderstanding of the child and confirms a lack of confidence in the child and its morals and values, which leads to a lack of confidence between the son and the father or mother. If this trust ceases to exist, the door of communication between them will be closed. Indeed, any strong relationship can only be based on mutual trust.
10- Blaming The Child:
When you place your son in the dock, you will act as a judge and make a verdict, and the investigator will be responsible for prosecuting, not as an educator and reformer. The allegation is expressed in your question. Asking why your son is late makes a big difference. Let him rest assured and ensure his safety, and ask him why he is late? Through accusations and distrust: The first impulse brings you closer and makes your son communicate with you, open up his heart and talk to you, and the second impulse makes him close and may cause him to run away and lie.
For you, punishing in various ways does not force you to focus on solutions, but to recover from mistakes or release tension. A punished child can answer your questions temporarily, or learn to repeat behavior: behave as a behavior in front of you, and behave differently when you are away;
This is a negative method that darkens everything in front of the father and makes all the behavior of the son a crime.
13- Remind him indefinitely of what you did for him:
13- Remind him infinitely what you did for him: A lot of reminding your child that your behavior and tiredness put him in a state of weakness and blame, usually for the purpose of trying to get rid of those lingering reminders. The child can then use the theft to support himself or later escape the house. There are many forms of recalls, including:
After I have done everything for you, are you doing this?
I work and feel tired for you…
14- Constant Criticism:
The father or mother does not like everything about the child. For every behavior of the child, parents must find loopholes to criticize. This review prepares his son for work and achievements, preferring to remain calm and isolated.
Warning (sometimes unacceptable) elements from children’s things can open warning files in their thoughts and thoughts. For example, talking to his son in a warning way: “Don’t smoke!”. Smoking becomes a reaction, challenge or opposite trend. Therefore, you must focus on what your son wants, not what you don’t need.